Birth Order Situations

Birth Order develops in one of five situations experienced by a child. A child may be alone, lose love to a younger sibling, competes with an older sibling showing off to get attention, be stifled by an older sibling who ridicules his or her ideas or be made to feel immature by an older sibling. When ignored by an older sibling the child experiences being alone.

Birth Order is developed under the intensity of emotion that is only experienced in the home. Lacking the intensity of emotion, daycare, school, playground or other experiences do not develop Birth Order. They enable the child to develop social skills but Birth Order is developed at home.

A child who is alone or ignored by the next older sibling who is Fourth Born becomes an Only Child personality. An oldest child who loses mother's attention to the new baby becomes First Born. The second child who must compete with the oldest child becomes Second Born. The third child has to endure but does not have to compete with the Second Born who is more interested in perfection than showing off so becomes Third Born. The fourth child does not have to compete or endure the Third Born but must cope with the "you are too immature" message so becomes Fourth Born. The child following the Fourth Born feels alone because the Fourth Born ignores him or her.

These formative experiences occur around age two, sometimes even earlier. Relationships between siblings can change with time so that the early dynamics that formed the personalities are not apparent later.

For various reasons these circumstances can occur elsewhere in the order of children than where they are normally found. However, they will always be in sequence rather than occur randomly in a family. In other words, Second always follows First, Third always follows Second and so on.